June 21

Jesus counsels his disciples to meet that fear with a remembrance of God’s love. “Do not be afraid… Are not two sparrows sold for a small coin? Yet not one of them falls to the ground without your Father’s knowledge. Even the hairs on your head are counted (in the midst of a pandemic when hair salons have been closed, that’s saying something). So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” 
 
Even given this assurance, it is not easy to trust that we will be upheld as we let go of whatever has given us a sense of security, a sense of identity. I remember once watching three of four young wrens fly out of their nest. The fourth one paced the ledge on which the nest sat, nervously eyeing the woods into which his or her siblings had flown. Letting go of whatever has given me a sense of self, a sense of control over my life, in order to live by faith is anxiety-producing. I want to cling to people who think as I do, institutions that do not demand too much of me, a worldview in which I can continue to live as I have lived - comfortably. 
 
Yet I believe the call of the Gospel is to live a new life, to move ever deeper into Love - for God, others, creation. And loving is risky, it entails sacrifice and pain. I cannot respond to this vocation without help. So I pray for God’s “constant help” as I eye the woods from my ledge. One thing I do know - it is only by letting go that I will come to know if Love can fully take flight within me.