On the Feast of the Holy Family, a young couple sat
in the pew in front of me at mass, one tending to their
two year old, the other to the newborn. At one point,
the wife reached over and slipped her hand into her
husband’s—just for a moment. It was a gesture of
gratitude and love. Its tenderness and beauty touched
me.
I have been married to my husband for forty years.
There have been moments in my marriage of such
tenderness and beauty. There have also been moments
that could not be described by either of those
words. I have come to believe that Love creates a
spaciousness within relationships that allows for the
wide range of feelings. Love creates room for the
emotional roller-coaster-like rises and falls that are
part of life together.
The Gospel reading on that feast day tells the story of
Mary and Joseph realizing Jesus is missing and returning
to Jerusalem to find him. If I put myself into
that story as a parent, I feel immense anxiety—and
most likely anger when my almost teenage son says
to me, “Why were you searching for me? Didn’t you
know I had to be in my Father’s house?” I assume
Mary and Joseph’s love enlarged their hearts enough
to hold the space for whatever emotions they felt at
that time.
It was a joy to sit behind that holy family on the feast
that celebrates families—and the holiness of the spaciousness Love creates.